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Post by Eʟʏsɪᴜᴍ Pʀᴏ on Nov 22, 2017 13:28:13 GMT -8
:: TAG TEAM GRAND PRIX QUALIFIER ::
[Tag Team Match]
The Enigma Protocol
(Ryan Gates & Miguel Villalobos)
vs.
Swag Baskets
(Helena Handbasket & K-Remix)
Deadline: Friday December 1st, 2017 at 11:59pm EST
Limits: 2 Promos of 1000 Words Each Per Team [Maximum]
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Post by Ryan Gates on Nov 30, 2017 13:21:37 GMT -8
I guess I owe both of you an explanation, huh?
With that, the silhouettes of three people appear in the light. The shortest one steps into the light revealing herself to be Cheyenne Black, the daughter of Jonathan Cage and niece of Ashe Corvin.
You see, Dad, I asked you on multiple occasions to stop this “war” that you were waging on Uncle Ashe. When those demands fell on deaf ears, I went to you, Uncle Ashe. You were just a bit more receptive to what I was saying. Then you made the decision to challenge my father to that damned Crusade match.
She runs her hands through her hair while making a face showing her disdain.
I did what I thought would make this shit stop between you two. I accepted the match on behalf of my father. Then, Dad, you became upset that I accepted the match. Instead of thanking me, you berated me for trying to put a stop to this. It was after that moment that I made the decision to put an end to this shit myself. Which is what led me to these two men standing behind me.
She smiles as the two other silhouettes step into the light revealing the two men who attacked both Ashe Corvin and Jonathan Cage at Hallowed Ground.
Do you two recognize these men? These men are the ones that put both of you out to pasture at Hallowed Ground. These men are the future of Elysium and will take the Tag Team Grand Prix by storm. And that starts at Frontline with the team whose name is absolutely fucking ridiculous. The Swag Baskets, sounds like something a teenage boy would call his nutsack. K-Remix, the thorn in my father’s side, the “reason” he came to Elysium in the first place. You still run your mouth about the both of them even when their own issues superseded their issues with you. Which is all fine and good but they’re gone now. You have to deal with me and my team.
She smiles as she looks to the taller man before looking to the shorter man.
These two men are going to run roughshod through the fledgling tag team division of Elysium Pro. A lot like my dad and Uncle Ashe did back in the day in eWo. Yet, these two men are going to do something that my dad couldn’t do and that’s beat the hell out of K-Remix and his gal pal of a tag team partner. You can talk all the shit you want about these two men behind me. It won’t change what will happen to you when you step into the ring with this team. Two men, trained by my father and my uncle who are going to prove that they are better than the men that taught them.
She giggles slightly.
That’s how I know these two men. They have issues with my father and uncle that culminated at Hallowed Ground. And the same same will happen to any team in the grand prix that is unfortunate enough to get in our way. We are the new generation of this business. Like it or not, we are the fucking future. If you don’t believe me then I guess you’ll have to find out the hard way. But that’s not my problem, it’s yours.
Then, the taller man places a hand on the shoulder of Cheyenne. He then stares into the camera.
We are the Enigma Protocol. You either bow down or get the fuck out of our way.
The taller man steps back as all three of them laugh and fade back into the shadows.
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Post by K-Remix on Nov 30, 2017 20:21:26 GMT -8
I bet that people are thinking that a lot of things have changed since I became the Hybrid Champion. I mean, I guess they have if we're talking about the amount of times I've changed my drawers. Shower every day peeps. It's not enough to look good, you gotta smell good too. You can't be walking around smelling like Miguel Villalobos looks. For real, he looks like he smells like a homeless shelter. I may actually bring my bottle of Invictus down to the ring this week and spray him down before the match. Is that legal? Wait, is him using his bad hygiene to gain an advantage legal? Somebody needs to look into these things.
Getting back to what I was saying though. Unless we're counting my clothes. Really, the only thing that has changed is that my name now adorns a championship belt. I've said all along that a title is only as respected as the person that holds it. Blood, sweat, and swag. My grind hasn't changed. People respected me long before I beat Ryleigh Mathis. Some might question the way that I carry myself. You know, because they hate swag culture. Which basically translates to them being old and wanting everybody to get off their lawns. Newsflash, you've become your parents. Yeah, let that sink in for a minute.
Anyway, as I was saying. Even though people might not like the way that I am. Nobody can say that I don't put in work like a champion. Whether it's in the gym preparing. Leaving no stone unturned when it comes to researching my opponents. Getting in these promos and reducing people to cinders. Or climbing into that ring and refusing to stay down. I'm built for this shit.
Before I move on to my match this week I need to address one person. That one person is Ryleigh Mathis. Now obviously the way that I handled our match was correct. I thought that I could rile her up. I thought that it would lead to her making a mistake. And I thought that I could capitalize on it. Bingo on all accounts. However I do have to give credit where credit is due. Little miss anger management brought it. More so than I thought that she could. So congrats Ryleigh, you were a bit tougher to put down than I thought you'd be. But don't let that go to your head. At the end of the day you still got put down. The same way you will get put down if you end up stepping back into the ring with me. That's a promise.
With all that being said, let's get to my match for this week. Swag Baskets Vs Enigma Protocol. K-Remix and Helena Handbasket Vs Ashe Corvin and Jonathan Cage the next generation. Seriously? As if having Ashe Corvin and Jonathan Cage around wasn't enough. Now we've gotta deal with a couple of guys who act like them? Think about it. They were trained by them and have the same mindset. If Jonathan Cage or Ashe Corvin want to make a splash, what do they do? They attack you from behind just like Gates and Villalobos did to them. Now do you want to know what separates me from guys like that? When I want to make a splash? All I have to do is show up.
In every federation I've competed in, that rings true. My name alone makes more of an impact than any attack these nimrods could orchestrate. So that right there should tell you all that you need to know. A Lion doesn't need to prove that it's a threat. You already know what it's capable of. Or to put it another way. What do you think the most aggressive dog breed is? A pitt bull? See that's where you're wrong. A pitt bull can fuck you up, there's no denying that. However they aren't the most aggressive. The most aggressive breed and the breed that always seems to have something to prove is far less dangerous. It's the chihuahua.
So when I see the Enigma Protocol doing what they did to Ashe Corvin and Jonathan Cage. It doesn't instill fear in me. It actually has no effect on me what so ever. All I see is a couple of chihuahuas. Trying to prove to the world that they're much bigger and much more dangerous than they actually are. Had they walked into Elysium and destroyed Ashe Corvin and Jonathan Cage in an actual match. Then I might be the slightest bit impressed. Then I might actually have an ounce of respect for them.
That's what they're going to have to do to Helena and I. They're going to have to beat us in that ring. They're going to have to work together in order to beat us in the ring at that. When you think about Ashe Corvin. When You think about Jonathan Cage. When you think about Cheyenne Black. What comes to mind? Stabbing each other in the back? How much do Ryan Gates and Miguel Villalobos trust each other? How much do they trust Cheyenne Black? When you keep the kind of company that they keep. You're always wondering in the back of your mind if you can truly trust them.
Helena and I don't have that problem. Before anything else, we were friends. So what this tournament provides us is the opportunity to do what we love. With somebody that we already call a friend. We're on the same page and we always are. That is what tag team wrestling is all about. Talent can only take you so far. And don't get twisted. I'm not saying that you two chihuahuas are more talented than we are. I'm saying that we're talented AND we embody what it means to be a team. That's why we're going to beat you. And that's why we're going to be Elysium's first Tag Champions.
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Post by Helena Handbasket on Dec 1, 2017 16:37:26 GMT -8
Helena Handbasket jumps into the shot, rattling a chain link fence, goggles down and her typical manic grin turned all the way up as she shouts. “LOS LOCOS KICK YOUR ASS
LOS LOCOS KICK YOUR FACE
LOS LOCOS KICK YOUR BALLS INTO OUTER SPAAACE!”
Suddenly she stops with a confused look on her face, physic-ward eyebrow raised. “What do you mean that’s not their gimmick? I mean I was having trouble with the fact that anyone would purposefully do that to themselves….Oh only one of them is called Oye Donde Gringos? So why did I let me do that? Really?...Wow...Other me is an asshole. Cause it was funny...Ok, it was hilarious. Anyway, Party Peeps! Down to the nitty-gritty, itsy bitsy, big smelly dudes I have to do the squared circle tango within a couple of days. Alpha Protocol, which was a great game...Not them? Equine Pancakes?....Close enough. I’ve looked into them, I gotta say I’m nowhere near the level of cynicality required to appreciate what Sadistic Spanish Nightwish is trying to achieve with their gimmick. What I do know is that they are two big dudes and one little chick that might have a crush on Mix. They’ve waaayyy over specialized in that area and that always leads to inherent weakness.”
Helena climbs a bit of the way up the chain link fence and proceeds to hang from it sideways. “Before any of you ask, there’s a reason I pitched teaming up to K, we’ve been friends for years true, but there’s something more. That’s the fact that the dude is the split side of my crazy-ass coin, he’s certainly the sane one in this franchise deal...Which should probably worry people...Point being, he’s big, I’m not so much. He’s fast, I’m faster, he’s strong, I’ve got a wicked sharp knee. We balance each other out and that’s a good tag team does. If your team is all stacked up with jacked up rhino’s then all we really have to do is figure out how to beat one rhino. It effectively halves any kind of resistance you can put up and we ain’t the kind to turn away from a fight. We’ve been friends for years and ever since we found out we’re both wrestling in Elysium, we’ve been working our asses off to work together like a well-oiled lawn mower headed straight at the faces of Steroid Mowgli and the Lebanese Lumberjack.”
Handbasket gives a slight sharp whistle and backflips her off the fence, bouncing when as she lands and doing a little dance. “K-Remix is, after all, Hybrid Champion and these guys are the pet trainee of two skin flint burns outs. Everybody probably thinks I’m the weakest link in this equation, but not Mix and not me. I’m not afraid to fail, everybody does. When I do fall it won’t be into anyone’s line and I’ll go down swinging. I can also, unlike La Herma’s Gansos, speak for myself thank you very much. Although Diego did want to start writing my scripts then he realized that everything that comes out of my mouth is sheer bat buggery and that may or not be a calculated part of my charm and gave up...Good try man...Look, I got news for Cyan Bright over there, I'm nobodies Gal Pal. I’m a threat all on my own, unlike your pack of picky peccaries, Remix and I separately are two of the best workers this show has ever seen. Together we’re a phenomenal sight to see, one that’s going to have the entire Elysium audience up in arms past their ears.”
Helena spins around and gestures with her thumb to the back of her jacket which now has Team Swag logo emblazoned on it. As she turns around she quirks her eyebrow again. “Did they...They really pointed out that our name is a balls joke?....They know we know that right?...They do realize that was point?...Why am I asking if a tag team raised by wombats has a sense of humor and irony? The answer is obviously a clarion and resoundering no...Wow, wait until they figure out my name, it’ll take them a while and I kinda wanna see the steam that’s bound to shoot out of their ears...As keen as I am to see that, I have to tell One for the Money, two for the freak show and three because you never know to slow their rolls. Big plans are great and all, but your first roadblock to greatness is the Swag Baskets...Ok, I can barely say that with a straight face, I love it. I know a little good don’t stop the devil, but a lot of shattering kicks to the face might...What do you mean I might be missing a step? I said to the face...It’s going to be a hell of a knee to the face to your plans I’m afraid because I’m out to prove that I’m not the weakest link, no goodbye for me. I’m sure as hell not letting my best friend down, you two grunts can hiss and snarl all you want. We’re bringing it straight to you, what is it? You’ll find out Sunday….P.s. It’s probably Swag, and it’ll kick your asses.”
Helena winks at the camera and gives one of her characteristic two fingers salutes before skipping her away off camera.
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Post by Miguel Villalobos on Dec 1, 2017 18:55:09 GMT -8
“There comes a time when the old has to step aside for the new. Sometimes the transition is easy and welcome. Sometimes the old has to be shown the side and forced there by the new. The old can overstay their welcome, chasing dreams of the past and ghosts of memories.”
The voice of Cheyenne Black seems to float out of the darkness. A fire flares to life, casting haunting shadows across her face.
“My dad and uncle were not taking the hint. Instead of sending the students they have trained, or their own children who are wrestlers, to Elysium they came here separately. Both for different reasons but but it was all for the simple fact of being in the spotlight once again.”
Cheyenne paces in front of the fire in the small wooded clearing.
“I put an end to them. I took them out of Elysium with the help of The Enigma Protocol. You might not have liked either my dad or my uncle, but they had history. They had drawing power that investors knew they could turn into profits. Now these men that I manage have taken that from them.”
The silhouettes of the team appear in the shadows behind her.
“Now we have to deal with the yapping little dog that tried to play with the big dogs. K-Remix, the little boy who tries to talk like a big man. He wants to say that my team has to use tactics their trainers did. Yet how soon he forgets that he needed my dad’s help to beat my uncle. Let’s not also forget that he went on to try and provoke my uncle after that. Then when my uncle acknowledged him and gave him his share back all of a sudden poor little Remix is the victim in all of this.”
A chuckle emanates from the shadowed figures.
“Pinche puto!”
Cheyenne chuckles.
“The Wolf does have a point there. You might have gotten yourself the Hybrid title at Hallowed Ground, Remix, but was that really the talk of the show? No, it wasn’t, no matter how much you want it to be. People were either talking about the World Title match, or the beating that my boys threw onto my dad and uncle. We are bigger talk than you winning a title is. So sit there and brag about your ‘swag’ and how unafraid you are. But I think all parties involved know the truth. That you are all but shitting your pants because your little team drew the men who put Ashe Corvin into the hospital. That was the first hospital visit he has ever had in his career due to what happened in a ring. Despite all of your efforts to drive him and my dad out, we were the ones to do it. We all but ended a career that night, Remix. What do you think will happen when you get into the ring with men that are willing to do that? That I am going to be directing them in their offensive against you and your partner?”
She raises a brow in question.
“I had two men attack and almost cripple my uncle and my dad. WHat chance do you have against that calling the shots? If I wouldn’t have them go easy on my family, what makes you think that that is even in the equation? You think your little aloof partner is gonna help you out that much?”
Cheyenne scoffs and shakes her head.
“You better be prepared for what is in store for the two of you. Helena, love the play on words in the name. Real good! You are basically just wrong place wrong time, I guess. We really don’t have anything against you per say...”
“Oye dile a esa puta, chupa mi verga!”
“Yeah, we aren’t gonna translate that Wolf.”
The shorter of the two figures throws up it’s hands and steps into the light revealing it to be Miguel Villalobos.
“Fine, we will get this translated then. Go on.”
Miguel grins and then starts to rapidly speak Spanish. After a few seconds delay a translation appears on screen.
{“I almost pity these two bitches that have to face us in our debut. They drew the short straw as fate pissed on them. The ‘swag’ queen and her little girlfriend think they stand a chance against us? Really? I have seen prettier whores down in Juarez, in the bad parts of town. We almost crippled Corvin with the Paradox Solution. Stop and think what that could do to either of you?”}
He chuckles and almost snarls.
{“You might think that you will be safe in your ‘Swagbasket’ but nothing, and no one shall clear the Enigma Protocol.”}
The trio chuckle and Miguel throws his head back and howls. In the distance he is answered by a pack of wolves as the scene fades.
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